What’s God Got To Do With It?

            Sometimes I hear it said, ‘How could God let the world deteriorate so?’  I always laugh to myself.  Isn’t that like us humans to not take responsibility for what we have done?  The world is exactly as we have made it.  Are we horrified?  Yes.  Rightfully so. Do we change?  Not appreciably.

            After the tragedy of 9/11 we were urged to return to normalcy.  Shouldn’t that event have shaken us so dramatically that we reflect upon our lives, how we have lived, and how we want to live?  Wasn’t that a wake up call of overwhelming proportions?  Why would we want to return to our 9/10 way of living?  Weren’t we given a glimpse that something we’re doing on earth isn’t right? 

            Why are we so afraid of looking deeply into ourselves?  I find such resistance to just experiencing consciously what is.  I suspect we are all caught in fear and we can’t find our way out.  Humans are such terrified little beings.  Rambo and Star Wars are just as fancy front for a trembling infant.  I meet people who will engage in cut throat negotiations but won’t stop for a few minutes just to breathe and to feel what it is to be themselves that moment.  Are our inner worlds that dangerous?

            I know they are not but I also know the depth and intensity of the pain that lies hidden there.  Feeling that is nothing to brush off lightly.  But we get through it and it passes and we are more whole for the journey.  What do we think this life is for anyway?  This isn’t IT.  We’re just preparing.  Working out the kinks.  Developing some grace, perhaps, in our attention.  Learning to let go of attachment and fear.  Realizing what is important.

            And what is that?  After we reach 50, many of us gain a perspective that ambition and self reliance had previously clouded.  That perspective extends inside ourselves into our depths and behind our fears and we can accept increasingly more of ourselves, warts and all. 

            I think that’s what God is going for.  Not simply a pleasant environment on earth.  Not an easy status quo. But radical self acceptance.  And that hurts!  We can’t fool God and after 50 it’s time to stop fooling ourselves.



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