Embracing Vulnerability

 

Throughout our lives we learn how to manage our feelings, demand respect, influence others, speak convincingly, carry ourselves with dignity, and defend our boundaries.  We can impress,  sometimes intimidate, and, once in a while, challenge. We know how to move through the outer world.

But what about the inner world? The space inside us is vaster and more complex than the outer world. In fact, our inner world dynamics make life happens as it does around us. When do we move inside and acknowledge the reality that is our core? When is it time to move into those soft spots inside and say to our vulnerability, “I embrace you and I love you”?

We hide our vulnerability from everyone else and we hide it from ourselves as long as we can. But, inevitably, there comes a point when we can’t ignore the sleeplessness or the longing or the restlessness or the frustration. We can’t keep pushing our way forward. And we don’t want to. It has cost us too much.

By mid-life we don’t even want to see our vulnerability as a problem. It’s our essence, the most basic part of who we are. How could that be a problem?! We want to say ”Yes” to every aspect of ourselves because this is who we are! And we want to shout our affirmation of ourselves. “Yes, this is me! Yes, I’m hurting. Yes, I cry. Yes.”

And in our “Yes” we find peace. It’s not our job to try, to effort, or to wear ourselves out. It’s our job to be ourselves, whatever that means. We’re not trying to be good enough or lovable. We don’t need approval. We need to be alive and feel ourselves and be. Just be. We’ve done enough.
Embracing our vulnerability, we cooperate with Life. We allow ourselves to be as we are and we allow Life to guide us. We don’t need the Controller in our minds to tell us what is appropriate. By owning the deepest parts of ourselves, we find freedom and passion and creativity. The gifts of mid-life.

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